Reading Habits

In January Eric and I made an agreement.  Eric has to do 1 book report for me every month.  I, on the other hand, will do a book report on every personal book I read in the year 2013.  Anything I read to my kids is exempt.  It is now mid-June.  I have followed through.  So has he for that matter.  The funny thing is....I look forward to doing my book reports.  I like having an overview of what I read.  I feel more disciplined in my reading since I have to give an account for it.  Not to mention, it's going to be very easy to put my 'Top Reads of 2013' together.  And I also think I am going to keep up the practice after 2013 has passed. So here are my stats thus far:

To date I have finished 15 books.
7 were fiction
3 were biographies
5 were non-fiction.

I have read 2571 pages of fiction
I have read 523 pages of biographies
I have read 1083 pages of non-fiction

It's very telling to note what you've been reading.  I like seeing the numbers.  I actually thought I read more non-fiction than I do.  I've also noticed that I'm taking in more clandestine reading than I thought.  Now to be fair, it takes a lot more discipline and thought and time to read non-fiction and sometimes I pick up rather difficult books that deserve time to go through them.  And I admit, I enjoy a good fiction.  Every night I read in bed to make myself fall asleep and that is purely fictional reading--it's gotta be light with no substance.  But we'll see where the numbers fall come December.

Dear Goodwin...

Oh, Goodwin, what is this intense, desperate hold that you have upon me?  It almost feels idolatrous except that your words hurl me towards Christ with such vehemence.  What is it that makes me cling to your books so much?  The very sight of those 12 black volumes on my shelf make my heart beat faster.  It feels sacrilegious to read your words too quickly and thus lose the intensity held therein.  Why is it that I feel as if I could safely place my soul in your capable hands? 

Your favorite topic is Christ.  And how you make Him come alive on every page!  You must know I am dull and suspicious and in turn you treat my soul delicately.  You open up doctrines slowly.  You repeat and review points--but never in a dull manner.  How many times have I had to stop reading and cry out in my soul, "Prove it Goodwin!  I hardly dare believe you.  Such wondrous truths you convey...."  But Goodwin, you bathe each new concept in Scripture.  You compel me to grapple with such amazing insights simply because they come from the very Word of God.  You prove over and over again that these fresh insights are but part of the old, old story.  You prove yourself to always, always always stay true to the Scriptures.  And Goodwin, for this reason you have become the very dearest of all my 17th century friends.

Portions that I've read a week ago hit me full force again as I sit under the preaching on Sundays.  Your words perfectly coincide with the full gospel of grace--yes, your words enlarge my understanding of the greatness of God's grace.

Since I've been reading you, I have come to love the book of Hebrews like never before.  You've transformed a book that previously was unclear to a book that now completely thrills me.

My prayers are deeper since I've started reading you.  There is a deep seated awe-some awareness of God that permeates my prayers.

I love how you so carefully plow the richness of Christ deeper and deeper into my soul. 

I am reading 'Christ the Mediator,' and I am thankful that I have much ground to cover yet.  Many thanks for your labor in the Lord, Rev. Thomas Goodwin.  It was not in vain.

A Spike in Numbers

It's really rather amazing...you see, I have the ability to see how many people read my posts.  I have hit a huge spike in readers since my last post.  Normally about 5 different people check my blog everyday.  That's an average.  Sometimes it's less, sometimes it's more.  What amazed me was after I wrote my very 'raw' post about my frustrations of being a mom my reader numbers spiked to a shocking 50 hits in 1 day. 

I could've easily taken that post down.  it's not very flattering--not for me or my kids.  But the main reason I left that post up was to prove that I don't want to be a fake.  It's easy to hide behind a carefully crafted online identity.  I want to avoid that.  We have good days and bad days here--plenty of both.  There are days when I love my kids to bits and days I really can't stand the sight of them.  I'm not saying that's Ok, but I'm still struggling through this process of sanctification.  Often it seems there is a type of disconnect between by head and my heart some days.  My head has a lot more of the answers than my heart does.  For example, I know it's wrong to fly off the handle, but that's exactly how I react to certain situations.  I have plenty of maturing to do yet.

I want to thank those of you who contacted me since the last post.  Your words were encouraging.  We've had a much better day today.  But I think the real test will come next Sunday as I sit in church and deal once again with all those little distractions.  Oh, how full of grace will I be towards these little ones of mine?  Will I remember that these little ones also belong to Christ and His church?

 

Frustrations

This is probably the worst of all blog posts to write, and I know I'm completely writing out of frustration.  Every point is going to be skewered.  Every word will probably have a negative slant to it.  And it probably won't end on a higher note either.  Let me say my piece.  Tomorrow will probably be brighter.

Some days I am so sick of parenting.  I've started this whole parenting gig 5 times now.  I'm tired of it.  And I'm frustrated. 

5 kids we've trained in church now and quite frankly, I'm tired of training kids to sit still.  I'm tired of missing sermons.  I'm tired of making sure they sing.  I'm tired of making sure they're facing forward.  I'm tired of dealing with their fidgeting.  I'm tired of looking forward to hearing specific sermons only to have the 2 year old be completely rambunctious in church and you end up disrupting the service and taking them out...again.  Yeah, I'm sure it was a great sermon for those who heard it.  I'm tired of standing up to sing the last song feeling like a crappy parent and just wanting to go home.  I'm tired of leaving church frustrated.  I'm tired of continually telling kids to sit straight in their seats in the van.  On the way home I'm tired of doling out further punishments due to poor behavior in church.  And then I sit in the van for the rest of the trip, overcome with bitterness, knowing full well that it would not bother me at all if I just left them there.  Somewhere along the way the kids never got the memo that mom needs spiritual refreshment too.

Some parents walk around talking about 'this is a blessing, and that is a blessing.'  Things like 'Oh, dirty dishes are a blessing because it shows we have food to eat.  'The toys are everywhere--what a blessing because they show that my kids are healthy.'  BLAH, BLAH, BLAH.  Right now all I see is work, and I haven't the energy or desire to keep up.  I made vows at their baptism that I would teach them so I'll keep plugging.  Really, I haven't any choice.  No one else wants to be raising my kids.  Obviously it's my job and I'll do it.  Just keep plugging...I'm good at that.  Seems like I've had practice doing that all my life.

Ok, ok, I'll stop now.

'Droppies'

The boys were certain they liked droppies.  But all they had really tried were the ones that daddy liked--the soft ones that taste like licorice and have virtually no salt level at all.  So when mommy bought herself a bag of her favorite droppies, the boys were eager to dig in and eat a bunch of mom's droppies.  They did not know that mom's favorite droppies are the very, very salty ones.  So I grabbed my camera and offered the boys my droppy bag.  Enjoy boys!

 

 

 

 

After their first taste, I offered them another.  Somehow I don't think I have to worry about having the bag emptied prematurely by little hands.

Another School Year Finished

This picture sums up what I feeling right now.  Slightly bedraggled, worn, clinging to my coffee cup with a death grip.  It's June 4 and I'm finally done the school year.  Every school year starts with soaring expectations and brilliant hopes to have the best year EVER!  Well, we did have a good year.  Despite it being my busiest year by FAR, I also think I was able to achieve a sense of accomplishment in regards to how I envision a successful school year should be.  We enjoyed a good number of field trips.  We saw 2 GREAT I-max's.  The kids got a lot of outside physical activity.  They really learned the value of hard work through the extra work a farm usually brings.  In addition they all did relatively well this year in their work.

Eric grew a lot.  He is growing into such a wonderful young man.  He has really learned to stop and think before speaking.  He has been much more patient and encouraging to his younger siblings.  He's always been diligent in his work, but especially this year.  I've been able to work side by side with him for many hours while sweeping the barns together and he is just a great kid to be around.

This year Lindsay really struggled with the increased work load that grade 2 brings.  She would far rather be cooking or learning how to be a little mother.  one thing I have really appreciated from Lindsay this year is her dedication to her piano.  This year she started lessons and she is really good!  Better yet, she has a real zeal for music and has excelled very quickly.  It is a real blessing to hear the notes from the piano wafting upstairs as she practices.

Paul did kindergarten this year.  but he wasn't a regular kindergarten kid.  Nope, that boy excelled.  Once he learned to read (which he pretty much undertook on his own accord) he didn't stop.  he went through the "K" reading program and half of the grade 1 program as well.  I finally asked him to stop in February.  He finds and reads his own material--literally devouring everything.  I will have to give him grade 2 readers next year along with grade 1 material.  Really, I love what he did, but I was unprepared for it.  The 2 older children had heavy schedules and I did not plan to spend an overabundance of time with Paul on his work this year.  It's kindergarten.  The fact that he did very well forced me to prepare a lot more work for him as he constantly requested.  This really stretched me thin as I had not anticipated this.  but what a worker!  Can't wait to teach him grade 1.

This was also my most exhausting school year.  One thing I did not realize as I began this year was the amount of time I would be required to spend in the barns.  Out of every 7 weeks, I was in the barn 5 full days.  That is 1 whole school week.  That adds up.  this meant taking out all other breaks during the school year in order to get done.  I always felt as if I was behind.  I was always playing 'catch up.'  I was constantly stressed.  In November I threw in the towel.  I researched schools.  I redid our budget to include Christian school fees.  I knew about class sizes, teachers, bussing schedules... everything.  I couldn't do it.  I couldn't keep up the pace.  But somewhere along the way I was reminded that this is about my children's hearts.  That's why I homeschooled.  So we kept plugging.  And yes, it was tough.  the whole year was tough.  But we pulled together as a family and grew again as a family. 

How good the Lord has been to me again this year.  Upheld again.  Strengthened again.  And again I  have grown in Christ's school.  To Him be the glory.



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A VERY Special Package!

 I finally received a VERY special package in the mail the other day.  Initially the seller would not send this package to Canada, so I had to find a US address that would be willing to forward this baby on.  And I did :-)

As you can see by all the stickers plastered all over this box, it's been on a bit of a journey!

 

Here's the 'It's bloody heavy' warning (as quoted by my friend in Seattle who received and forwarded the package on).

 

 

 Here's one small look at what I paid to get this package to my door....

 

 

 

Of course Canada Customs needed to get their share as well......

 

Then I had to drive to a postal outlet in Edmonton to pick it up.  They asked for a little more money too.

 

And....after all that expense and inconvenience, here they are!!!!!  The complete works of Thomas Manton in their rare, red hardcover set.  Only 1000 sets were printed!

Pretty huh?  They get top shelf because they obviously are the MOST valuable in every sense of the word.  Of course, after getting a set of books, I have to rebalance all the colors of the library.  Can't have sets that clash with each other color-wise.  Also, the most important books have to be at the top.  You may never, never, NEVER break up a set.  And there should be no empty spaces on the shelves.  Those are simple, but very important personal library rules.  I take them VERY seriously.